Breaking Dawn Part 2 – Okay…I Saw It

So, like the rest of the country I have been fighting through this weird flu that seems to NEVER go away. My nose has been stuffed up, my voice has dropped in register making me sound scratchy and little bit like Demi Moore (I know…not such a bad thing), and my head has ached. I also have been housebound.

Needless to say, I got myself out of the house and went to…the mall. Walking around I got tired and found myself near the movie theaters. The only one playing that I could see beginning to end was BREAKING DAWN PART 2. My vow of never paying for a movie ticket to see any film in the TWILIGHT franchise quickly faded in place of a deep desire to sit down.

What can I say? BREAKING DAWN PART 2, aka, the creepy CGI baby movie, is a terrible waste of film. But again, the books – loved by tween girls around the world – are terribly written (I have said this before) and therefore it is difficult to adapt a shitty book into an enjoyable film. But the problem with this movie is way beyond the source material.  Like I stated, it is the creepy CGI baby movie. For some reason the director (Bill Condon –  DREAMGIRLS) applies a weird treatment to the famous half-human, half-vampire child Renesme. It’s just…creepy. And worse it’s badly executed. In the time of AVATAR, to have a special effect so poorly applied makes the movie even more laughable.  Plus, the original story was so lacking in conflict (the author Stephanie Meyers refuses to have anything bad happen to her characters to elicit growth or true crisis) that the ending is be majorly tweaked by the screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg (who is now developing her own show for TV – look what adapting shitty books can do for you) in order for a film audience to sit the 90 or so minutes and not be bored out their minds.

I’m still sorry I spent the money for a theater ticket for this movie. I should have waited until I could Netflix it like I’ve done with all the others, but like in the movie CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE ( a fabulous script written by Dan Fogelman, Netflix it today) “I went and saw the latest Twilight movie – and it was sooooo bad.” That about sums it up.